Sometimes it feels like I have a loss for words.
And if you know me, you’re probably sitting there reading this going, “well, that’s not the Dragonfly I know.” And your right; most of the time, I can find my words or at least “make them up.” If you really know me, you will know that’s a family trait of ours, making them up by adding letters that aren’t there or omitting them all together at times. Is that a midwest thing?? lol
So what do I mean by? I have a loss for words right now. Well, I find myself when certain things happen in the world, I get so overwhelmed, and there is so much emotion in me that I don’t have the words to relay anything at that moment. Or when I have so many ideas and thoughts running in me that I bounce around with it so much I can’t pull anything that makes sense out of it.
In the end, it leads to having no words. Feeling as if they are definitely there, but nothing is coming out. Is that what they consider “writer’s block” for writers? Not sure. Well, all I know is that’s what has happened to me today. And many times before. It makes me feel incapable, useless. Like I’m lacking. AND I’M NOT!
And this is where I step into my empathy and compassion for myself. Being kind to me. Saying to myself in acknowledgment that there have been some challenging, sad, and frustrating things going on, worldly and directly personal. Some added stresses to my emotions that I was not expecting. Which if you think of it, are we ever really expecting emotional upheaval? No, but we know it will happen, and it impacts us in ways not always apparent at first. And when it becomes apparent, we don’t always show kindness to ourselves.
The reality of it all is. You are not in control of anyone but yourself. You will lose people, we all have an expiration date, and it hurts when we lose people we love and care about. You will have imperfect days because perfection is a fairytale. You will feel as if everything is crashing down, even if it isn’t, because things happen out of your control.
These past couple of weeks have reminded me… like I forgot…
That we don’t live forever. Losing a friend suddenly to cancer.
That business is ever-evolving, and when you think this is it, it’s THE plan; another one can present itself and throw you for a loop. Redirecting you some way.
And that sometimes people are not held accountable for hateful, horrible actions and get away with them.
That technology, as fantastic as it is, it’s equally frustrating.
So the way you choose to handle “it” is HUGE! That is one thing you do have is choice. You get to choose kindness, empathy, compassion, love, sadness, disappointment, and how you express yourself or don’t.
When I remember this and step into it, I find my words. I empower myself to choose. To make a choice.
That may even start with the option to get up, take a walk.
Cry for a moment.
Be quiet.
Jump up and down and shake my body out!
Or love who I love a bit deeper, and I let them know it.
I choose to shift myself in the way that fits best for what my body needs. I ultimately decide to listen to myself and hear it.
Does any of this sound familiar to you? If so. I see you. Me too. You are not alone. If anything in this resonated with you and you want to reach out to me to get it out. Please do. Don’t hold it in. Share it with me. Sometimes it helps to share with someone who cares, and I do.
Sending you extra love along with the Orgasmic love and hugs from my heart to yours,
Dragonfly xx