Holding Space 

This video is the first lesson in a Playlist on the fundamentals of communication. You can find the rest of the videos in the Orgasmic Membership Area.

Enjoy this lesson and use the experiential practice to bring more understanding and deeper connections in all of your communications, and when you are ready to get to the really juicy stuff, join me in the members' area and start to live your Orgasmic Life!

Experiential Practice

Notice how you feel the next time you're having any conversation with someone. 

  • Are you-"Holding space" for them?
  • Is it easy to only allow them to talk?
  • Do you want to, or are you interjecting when they are speaking? Meaning talking over them.
  • Are you wanting to fix or offer advice to help? 

Over the next week, set aside some times to actively practice holding space for yourself and your partner. 

For yourself:  Pull up something that has been on your mind- something you've been contemplating, trying to figure out or work through. Use the essential aspects of holding space for yourself. Essential aspects for yourself. 

  • Release, let go of the judgment and criticism for yourself. 
  • Be open & honest with yourself.
  • Practice having empathy, compassion, and to accept your truths, no matter what those truths are. 
  • To allow and accept who you are in that moment in whatever shows up. 
  • No interjection of fixing or finding the answer, just being. 

Set a timer for 5 min. As you think about that topic, what happens? Notice any responses happening with yourself as you let your mind wander in this topic.Were you able to use the essential aspects of holding space? If not, what was challenging? You may want to note what was happening during this process specifically for you. Emotions, sensations, and thoughts. 

With your partner:  Choose a topic-maybe a current event in the world, or something that has affected you at work. Use the essential aspects of holding space while you are listening to your partner. Essential aspects of holding space for others. 

  • One is managing your judgment for the person you're holding the space. 
  • Listening and being open without wanting anything back.  
  • The practice of having empathy, compassion, and to accept someone's truth, no matter what those truths are. 
  • To allow and accept, putting your needs and opinions aside and allow someone to just be-who they are at that moment. 
  • No interjection of fixing or sharing what you would do. 

Set a timer for 3 min.-for each of the conversations. Take turns holding the space and being the lead person talking. The person with the shortest hair goes first, holding space. After each round, journal your own experience. After both rounds, it's time to share how it was for each of you. And don't forget to keep practicing holding space as each of you share your experience.